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April 3, 2012

Mexican coinsWe are somewhere in a desert, in Nevada, I think. Gregg is driving and the rest of the gang is asleep. I am in love with Jaime, but leaving him. I’m on my way back to my real life and family. No, I don’t think I will marry Jaime, although it is a nice fantasy escape to dream about it. I feel like I am in love with a dream.

Was that all real? Did it happen? Did I dream all of that? The whole trip is just about as real as last night’s dream: it’s a memory; although I do have some tangible proof that I was in Mexico, some coins, gum wrappers, a 7-Up bottle that says ‘hecho in Mexico.’ I have a million memories that will stay with me always, though I suspect some may fade in 60 or 70 years.

Yes, I was in Mexico. Bart told me he’ll call me sometime. My good friend, Bart. He really is nice, in his odd way.

And Lisa. What a time we had together! I feel like God put us together so that we could have exactly the kind of trip that we did have! It’s so funny, everything that happened, like a script to a play and we just wandered in as the characters and lived for a while in Mexico. The experience would not have been the same without Lisa. She is not like anyone else I know!!! I feel like we’ve been friends forever, almost like sisters. I plan to keep in touch with her.

I miss my family. I can’t wait to see them! My life is different now, my whole attitude is different now! My friends will wonder why I stopped getting high. (Maybe I’ll have to get new friends!) Really, I’m high on life! I never want to lose my sight (or my mind!) because of something that I can control. I especially don’t want any substance to control me. (Is that why it’s called a controlled substance?)

I sure feel different about myself, about my life and about the choices I have to make than I did just a few weeks ago! I am OK, just how I am. (Think of the time and money I’ll save! And I am in control now. I can focus in on a whole new direction!)

We’re getting so close, just a few hundred miles or so!  I think I’ll sleep until we get home.

Eso es todo.


From → Journal

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